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Hi Aaron, I've been coming to your site for a while now and really enjoy your writing. I'm a 36 year old straight man, and have two boys, one who is just on 15. We suspect he may be gay, and we know there is talk at his school that he is. I must admit that I have followed any writings of yours on the subject of sexuality with great interest. It is daunting to me because I would not want my son to grow up in a world where he has less rights and has to put up with discrimination which is certainly in our community, and he has been bullied at school for his classmate's suspicions. I'm determined to deal with this is this is the case, but there are many issues that I find confronting me. That my son will never be able to marry or experience being a father (one of the true joys of my life) plays on mind all the time. Your writing about the importance of gay marriage rights in respect to shaping how these young men appraoch themselves and life is really interesting, and is something I must say I have not seen anywhere else (and I've been doing my research!). It makes perfect sense that gay men are less likely to engage in loving relationships as being valued, if they live in a world where they know they have been denied to be recognised for it. A lot of the awful talk I hear from the other fathers at work is that gay men are seen as "sluts", and that why should we give them the right to marry when it's something they don't respect anyway. To hear this come from a co-worker who happily boasted to his workmates that he cheats on his wife was quite infuriating as it was, but I am constantly struck recently by the lack of understanding out there from people who don't even seem to want to understand, and are so quick to judge, even if they live in glass houses. I hope that you guys get the rights you deserve. And if my son does decide he's gay, then I will happily join the fight as a proud father. Whatever problems there are with gay men because of what they have gone through, I know they are basically the most passive creatures we have, and do not deserve the ignorance and nastiness that's out there. Please keep up your wonderful discussions, they provide something really unique and explian other complicated ideas in a way that I think people can really understand. If what you're doing is achieving greater understanding in today's world, then you're onto a really good thing! Thankyou, David Thanks so much, You're a wonderful example of a real man! Homophobia is, at the end of the day, so spineless and insecure of these supposedly tough straight men. Good on you! And thanks for the kind words. What's good is that you seem fine, no matter how your son "turns out". But know that many straight boys are bullied at school and accused of homosexuality, simply because they do not fit stereotypes. Sometimes, the mob are wrong! So as long as your son knows that it's okay if he is, time will tell. And if he knows how supportive you are (if that is the case), he will tell you much sooner than later, once he's sorted it out. Aaron
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